His Love ( Credits to Rai Abellana)

It was late in the afternoon when I was writing for my blog. The news on air was about a woman who had been hit by a truck. I am not fond watching t.v nor news but when I heard a familiar voice, it caught my attention to glance at the breaking news. And it was a friend of mine who had been interviewed. I didn't heard clearly what he was saying but the caption talks about a woman who had been hit by a running truck at Relocation,Panacan. 

My friend's name is Rai Abellana ( Rai Lacoste, Gamay)Linkand he's one of the closest friend of my boyfriend. Upon hearing the news, I texted my boyfriend about. It was around 6pm, Rai was fetched by his mom at the cafe, my boyfriend's lil brother is with them. While they were walking a raging truck was coming towards them, luckily Den (lil bro. of my bf) saw the truck and he drag Rai away from it.

Rai's mom was left behind her place and stood still but guess what, Rai did draw his mom away from it's place. According to Rai, he's acting like a "Suicide Bomber" that time, trying to save his mom. Luckily, his mom is alive but only have bruises and is now currently admitted at San Pedro's Hospital.

His heroic stance gave me an idea to write this blog although I should have written this few days ago but due to my lil brothers' admition at the hospital because of U.T.I, I don't have the chance to work on this blog. But now, it was.

Everyone of us loves our parents although some of us experienced brutality and shame because not all of our parents are ideal. but think of it, they took care of us for 9 months without hesitation and idea to abort us. there are times of misunderstanding that you seem so alone and you don't have any person to run to, and sometimes parents contradicts to the things we want.

Hence, God gave us to those person who will loves us forever. Parents are the mirror of God's love too. Can't you see it? Parents wants the very best for us, they gave us education and pure love. they never leave us alone. So i relation with Rai's story, he never hesitate to save his mother although there is a big chance for him to die with her mom. Imagine an uncontrolled truck who will crush you into pieces, isn't it bloody?  

Rai is an example of true love towards his parents. We should see him as a role model of love to our parents.

Till the next blog.

Mua :*

The Book i've read is all about....

This is not about me and my boyfriend. 

I have read a booklet which was all about finding the true essence of love and find out whether it is a true love or not. I brought this booklet from OMF. If you are not open minded you would say that the author is against in a teenager relationship but it wasn't like that. It talks about the guidelines God gave us in the written book which is the Bible and the author also wrote some stories related.

The first story was all about Rachel and Jacob. Jacob waited for 14 years just to marry Rachel. (WHOA! at this moment of generation no one could stay longer waiting that long). He served Rachel parents for 7 years but the father of Rachel let Jacob marry Leah. Leah was blind folded when they are having their sexual intercourse and it was too dark for Jacob to see who as the woman he's having an affair with. In the end Jacob found out it was not Rachel, Laban did it because it was in their rule that the eldest daughter should marry first. Because of the perseverance of Jacob to marry Rachel he waited again 7 years it sums up 14 years to marry Rachel and they bore a child.SEE ? Love can wait if a man is willing to.

The second story was about a young lady who had a relationship with a young man. Since their parents doesn't want her to enter the kingdom of love they became so strict and even harbored the mobile phone of the young lady. So there was no communication between the two lovers. The young man bought the lady a phone, they meet distance from the lady's house but they were seen by their father until the harbored for the second time the phone. The young man capitulated and do nothing, he left the young lady without remorse on his face. PITY ON HIM. if he really loves the young girl, he will face her parents bravely.

Talking about the "S" word. Nowadays, Sex is not a big deal according to the most interviewed closet queens. But, there is a thing that they did forget. It is against the will of God. It is said that engaged after you get married not before you get married. There is a lot of teenager there who get involved with PMS (premarital sex) and do they know that there a lot of illness they can get because of it? Like STD?

In a relationship, it is normal that you're parents are involved. At the age of the 26, parents could not dictate you anymore since you are stable in life. Parent's knows best. Our father doesn't wants us to loose our virginity just because of that dumb guy while our mother doesn't want us to get hurt. The same thing God wanted for us. It's not like you are being jailed and you don't have freedom. You have all the freedom you wanted for, but bear in mind the consequences you'll face.

If you are already engaged to PMS, God is a forgiving God but he is also a Jealous God. I thank him He is one Since He is jealous because he doesn't want us to put into fire. If you wanted to change, you could. Since He is a forgiving God just make sure you are sincere..

To all readers, i know you already knew what this blog is all about. you are not ignorant to the rules of God. I just wanna share what i've learned from the book.

Till the next blog. 

Mua :*

It's okay..

I wasn't happy for the last few days but I'm trying and right now I'm working over it. I was talking about keeping in silence on my last blog yesterday and indeed I'm proving that I could do it though, in tough times there is anxiety and stress but I know I could do it. I'm not the only man in this world and I know I could reconcile and forgive someone. But silence is the best thing to do right for me not to be hurt.

Okay, I'm blabbing a lot of here and I know you're confused why I wanna keep silent. I wanna move on in silence and rejoice. I wanna be someone, a new one; not someone who I am really not. So I'm changing styles in life but I can't do it that fast, I'm having it slowly until I could have the perfect changes in me. It might be too awkward to those who knows me a lot more than you do but I wanted this to happen.

There was this person who is more attached to me and I 'm thanking her for being one. One of those people who touched my life. She's important and unforgettable, sweet loving person. She's far away, but I know she'll be reading this blog. I wanna thank her for being part of my life :) 

PS.Don't worry. You're still the one, I'm still your friend though there are changes, lol. As if naman matanggihan kita sa kabaitan mo ! Anyways Highways. o matter what might happen I'm still here, right beside you. Don't forget that. I Love you, more than you think I could.  :*

Till next blog. Mua :*

Sadness.Trust.Happines

Have you ever experienced being very happy? Have you ever experienced that your smile lines almost teared up because of laughing? Do you have Friends? Did they gave you a reason to be offended? Did you give them a reason not to trust you?

So here I am crying all over again. I was sad since yesterday until now, I am. I don't have a buddy to talk to at school so I kept this all by myself. Indeed it's better for me to leave John Paul for I know there is more hurt feelings I could get there and I could not concentrate to my studies. This is not my reason why I shifted nor transferred. This problem was rooted from the circle of friends from my previous school. 

Nights, days, weeks, months I've been waiting for them to tell me the truth but until now, no one. So I was bombarded with too much emotions from it. Every night, every glimpse of their faces at facebook hurts so much so I decided to ask advices from my recent friends at school and also to my so called "BEST FRIENDS". And they have the same comments and feed-backs but I end up asking my friend way back in highschool, she was a kind of girl that frequently talks to God and this was the first time to ask her for advice,luckily she's online so I grabbed the chance to ask her yesterday. She have the same comments and feedback but she gave me a different advice. I didn't really followed her advice but it gave me a hint of what to do.

I don't what to publicized what the problem is, I still wanted it to be private since many people are involved.

I gave trust but I never expect trust to come back. Trust is an important element to all kinds of relationship.

But if you were in my shoes what will you do?

• You were blinded from a secret that your friends knew.

• You found out what the secret is.

• You confronted one of them as if you don't really know the truth.

• You failed. Instead you got ashamed since a lot of people saw your pale face because the one you confronted persisted that you're really wrong. And you felt embarrassment from the time when she used a lot of people for you to believe.

• You heard a lot of confirmations from other people and you knew it was true.

• You waited for a long time for them to tell you. But, No one.

WHAT WILL YOU FEEL ? WHAT WILL YOU DO?

I know there is limitations on everything but the fact that you already knew the truth and a lot of people knew it already aren't you feel bad?

So the hint brought to my mind made me a move to loosen up the feelings of being outcast. i emailed a friend who knows it and i told her that i feel bad about it.WHY. I' asking WHY? Am I not a good friend? Do you see me as a serpent? Am I not reliable?

I know how to understand but in this problem, I can't :(

I don't want to insist myself if you don't want me to. It's a mess on my part. So I decide to isolate myself although I've got a lot of friends but you were different. All of us are different, but since then, I've been hurt and I don't want to hear mean comments and apology. I want things jive with the flow, I don't want to make this story long anymore. I'm happy for you guys especially to the main person. Ahhmm. I don't think I can speak to you anymore pretty girl.

In my previous blog, I've written I visited John Paul. A lot of things changed, You friends especially the one I confronted. I don't want to talk more about her but she changed a lot from what I've seen before. 

So I am enrolled at Davao Doctor's, this the start of the new beginning. Making new friends, having a lot of friends to mingle. I know it's not that easy but I would make it easier for me. I'll be me ! I'll put back the smile that I was wearing before.

I know someday you'll read this blog. I hope so. I'll keep my mouth shut when it comes to you guys, you know who i am talking about here, you're intelligent, I know you were.

God bless and Take care..

Mua :*

Just Today..

I'm in a hurry for my Rizal class annoyed that there will be an exam because I don't when ma'am would have the exam but fortunately he didn't gave the exam instead tomorrow she will :) Jeleena caught up my attention when she called me obsessed since she's a blogger also. Jeleena is a classmate of mine and she's a reader and I know she will read this .. Credits to your advice dear, I was so obsessed and  wrapped up about my boyfriend, thanks for your advice lately that I shouldn't find something wrong about our relationship. I just then realized that you are right. Mua :*

I am bored at school after my Rizal class so I decided to visit my previous school. I am so keyed up to see my friends there. As I arrived, I directly went to the canteen since it was lunch break and I saw them there, i hurriedly staggered one of them named Jessa. I talked a lot of things on them, about my life at Davao Doctor's and so much more. They were very busy for their assignments since they were under my aunt who's fund on giving a everyday quiz and an everyday assignment. Lucky to see another friend so we chat a lot. I also saw my best buddy named Jhoel with her Girlfriend named Monique.

Jhoel hugged me hurriedly when he saw me. I thought this gag doesn't know how to miss someone. LMAO since he was a bully but kinda sweet person. I really miss my best bud since we are partners in Crime :D LoLs. 

But there is a lot of changes among them, my friend have beautify her hair and she's not like before that's very cheerful and entertaining. She is now silent and studious. Lol. Anyway. I got a lot of fun and chat with my 2 dear friends though we don't hang a lot before but they are one of a kind. We talked a lot of things such as Sex, Chat and Love. LMAO. best topic in town..

How I wish they are just a walking distance from me so that I could update them. They are such a busy person right now, not like me just sitting pretty. I almost forgot, one of my teachers praised me "NI GWAPA LAGI KA KARUN"  just then I replied, "ANA JUD NANG DLI STRESSED MA'AM" Lol. Indeed I'm not stressed at this time around..

So, i'll be visiting them again by February 4th since it was JPCD Night and my Buddy will be one of the contenders with her girlfriend so I will be cheering up for them..

Till next time.. 

I love you. Mua :*

Smile

Every time you smile it reminds me how much love you and it seems like it was imprinted on me from head to toe. I can't forget your attractive smile where I feel out in love. You made me smile when I am sad, you make me laugh and happy. Something's telling me it might be you but I'm wondering how I could think of this kind of thought when you've got nothing to do but make me happy.

We will be celebrating our anniversary on the 23rd of March and I can't wait for it. You were the first person who reached this long, I mean I haven't experienced reaching a year relationship, usually it's just like a maximum of  4 months. 

I was called a varsity of all the playgirls, hanging out with boys. I am not pretty, I am not one of those party girls but I drink (not that much), I do smoke (but not that much;occasionally). I've got a lot of boyfriends, but it doesn't last that long.

And now that I have you, i didn't expected much in our relationship because as what I have experienced, Long term relationship is impossible, long term relationship is not attainable. Boys doesn't stay at me longer for some reasons.

I am not saying that I am a beautiful brainiac ideal woman to be with. But how many times I gave my heart , how many times I gave my trust , how many times I fell in love and fall out of love and within those relationship I always fell apart with a broken heart. I already heard all those fucking promises.

But when you came into my life you made no promise, you didn't do something wrong; you just made me smile. You made memories with me. I admit that jealousy is a part of me but the spark in your eyes made me a puppy entailed to your back. Isn't it funny? You made me fell in love with you.

All my senses come alive, the spark, the love.. I can really feel it ! And I'm blabbing a lot here on my blog because I can't express the feeling inside me all I can say is I LOVE YOU... ! ♥

You're a puzzle piece that I'm trying to solve...

You held your hands on my waist.

You kissed my forehead.

You whispered something cheezy on my left ear.

You hugged me tight.

You made me laugh.

You made me smile.

You loved me at most times.

The way you struck your guitar strings.

The way you get mad at me.

The way you send messages when you feel your love was overflowing.

It makes me blush at all times.

How I wish to publish all your sweet messages here but for now I wanna keep it to myself and stay private :D

I LOVE YOU LEYLAND SANTOS.. mua :*

Puzzled mind

Okay. I have this weird feeling of mine but I am not sure of what really it is. I am very superfluous when it comes to my boyfriend and my mouth won't stop unless I'm satisfied. I check his accounts frequently when I'm online and it seems it wasn't active, there is no notifications and updates on his wall, all I can see is my wall post and some tags from his friends. Where is the updates when he comments to another persons and where is his updates when somebody added him or when he adds somebody..

I'm a very abstract person and I'm quite fond fixing the puzzled mind of mine, I am not contented on a few facts I can't sleep and I can't stop my jealousy. I find ways just to figure it out and now I can' find any flaws on it. It seems he knows that I was visiting his account every now and then..

I want to confront him about things. I want to know something but I can't dare to ask because I know he gonna say something that I don't like  to hear.

Things I don't like to hear are:

1. "Kelangan jud?"

2. "Ok"

3. "Mao bah"

4. "Duh"

5. "Ngano man diay"

For me, those words sounds sarcastic, I don't text nor speak that way because I construct words that can't hurt the feelings of others.

I dont also like person's who always asks "NGANO?" especially when they know it. I hate persons acting like they are blind when they know what's all about.

This is why I hate him sometimes because when the environment seems like out of cast I just text him "Ok. tyl busy man". Why? when we're texting he just flee away or sometimes he just like out of the topic and just reply OK???

ohh my gehd naman oh !!!!

So this weird feelings of mine got puzzled why these things are happening.. lawls. 

And this blog will end up here cause It's getting late and I should study my lessons cause it is  my exam tomorrow !

Chow !